The Social and Emotional Struggles of Young Learners

When a child walks into school each morning, academics are only part of the picture. What often shapes their entire school experience – their motivation, their confidence, and even their ability to learn – is how connected they feel to the people around them. Social and emotional struggles in elementary school are more common than many realize, and when left unaddressed, they can follow a child far beyond the classroom. Understanding what these struggles look like, why they matter, and how teachers can respond is essential to supporting every young learner.

Why social relationships matter so much in school
Identifying socially isolated children
Withdrawal and shyness
Aggression and rebelliousness
Three types of isolation teachers should recognise
The teacher’s role in supporting social development
Creating an inclusive classroom culture
Using sociometric techniques to understand classroom dynamics
Facilitating healthy peer interactions
A shared responsibility

According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, friendships allow children to “broaden their horizons beyond the family unit, begin to experience the outside world, form a self-image, and develop a social support system.” This isn’t simply a feel-good observation – peer relationships are foundational to how children develop emotionally and academically.

Research consistently shows that every aspect of a child’s behavior in the classroom is influenced by their emotions, some of which foster learning while others inhibit it. Social skills shape whether a child actively participates or withdraws. A child who feels accepted and connected is far more likely to engage, take risks, and persist through challenges than one who feels on the margins.

The stakes are real. A clinical study published in the American Medical Association journal found that children who do not experience appropriate social-emotional development are likely to face exclusion from learning environments in the short term, and in the long term, face increased risk of mental illness, poor academic achievement, and poor physical health in adulthood.

A meta-analysis of 213 studies also found an 11 percent gain in academic achievement for students who participated in evidence-based Social-Emotional Learning (SEL) programs compared to those who did not – and these students also showed improved classroom behavior and better ability to manage stress and depression.

Identifying socially isolated children

Social isolation in children doesn’t always look the same. Some children quietly fade into the background; others act out loudly. Both can reflect the same underlying struggle – a difficulty connecting meaningfully with peers.

Withdrawal and shyness

Common signs of social withdrawal include avoiding break times and group activities, struggling to start or maintain conversations, avoiding eye contact, showing closed-off body language, and appearing frequently lost in thought rather than engaged with surroundings. Children who have experienced bullying or repeated rejection can develop a fear of social situations that causes them to pull away further over time.

It’s important to distinguish between shyness and true social withdrawal. Research in developmental psychology notes that shy children are quiet and hesitant with strangers, but this is not the same as social withdrawal. Social withdrawal is characterised by a broader tendency to avoid peers across most social settings – and it can stem from internal factors like anxiety, low self-esteem, and a perceived lack of social skills.

A major review published in the journal Developmental Psychology found that socially withdrawn children are at elevated risk across multiple domains – including anxiety, depression, peer victimization, poor teacher-child relationships, and school avoidance – from early childhood through adolescence.

Aggression and rebelliousness

On the other end of the spectrum, some children end up socially isolated not because they retreat, but because their behavior pushes others away. A qualitative study involving elementary school teachers found that children displaying aggressive behaviour were described as hostile, rule-breaking, and highly active – and while they sometimes sought social participation, peers would reject them when they became disruptive or hurtful. The result was the same: isolation.

A longitudinal cohort study published in PMC confirmed that children with early behavioral problems or ADHD symptoms were at significantly greater risk of becoming increasingly isolated over time. Prosocial behavior and minimal conflict are the qualities peers value most in friendships – so children who are disruptive or aggressive can find themselves steadily excluded from social circles.

Three types of isolation teachers should recognise

Research on teacher observations of isolated children identifies three meaningful distinctions that should guide how teachers respond: children who stay alone because they are socially fearful, those who genuinely prefer solitude, and those who stay alone because they are rejected by peers. These require very different kinds of support – and misreading one for another can make the situation worse.

Teachers spend more waking hours with their students than almost anyone else in a child’s life. That proximity gives them a unique and powerful opportunity – not just to teach content, but to actively shape how children relate to one another.

Creating an inclusive classroom culture

The U.S. Department of Education’s Safe Supportive Learning framework emphasises that programs, practices, and policies must align with and reinforce social-emotional learning goals. This includes something as seemingly small as how students move through a hallway – every routine can be an opportunity to practise social awareness. Teachers who set clear, visible behavioral expectations and model empathy and respectful communication lay the groundwork for a classroom where inclusion is the norm, not the exception.

According to Edutopia, teachers should be alert when young children do not bring self-confidence and trust into the school environment, as this can indicate disruptions at home and should be escalated to school mental health professionals. Early identification matters enormously. Without intervention, behavioral and social-emotional challenges in young children may be harder to address after age eight.

Using sociometric techniques to understand classroom dynamics

One of the most practical tools teachers have for understanding peer relationships is sociometry – a structured approach to mapping the social landscape of a classroom. Through methods such as peer nominations (asking students to name classmates they would like to work with), peer ratings (rating classmates on a scale), and sociograms (visual maps of classroom relationships), teachers can identify who is well-connected, who is isolated, and where social friction exists.

As PublicSchoolWORKS explains, students who feel a strong sense of belonging are more likely to succeed academically and socially – while those who are marginalised may struggle with both academic and emotional challenges. Sociometric data gives teachers a clear, evidence-based picture of these dynamics before small problems grow into significant ones.

Importantly, a published study in School Mental Health found that teacher practices designed both to improve children’s classroom behaviors and to encourage peer inclusiveness each predicted better sociometric ratings by the end of the year. In other words, what teachers do daily – how they manage behavior, facilitate activities, and set social norms – directly influences how students perceive and treat each other.

Facilitating healthy peer interactions

Beyond assessing the social climate, teachers can actively engineer better peer connections. Research published in Frontiers in Psychology found that how teachers assign students to groups has a measurable effect on peer friendship and conflict across the school year. Deliberate grouping – mixing children with different strengths, backgrounds, and social profiles – can disrupt clique formation and create opportunities for unlikely friendships to develop.

A particularly effective approach is peer-pairing. Research published in Developmental Psychology found that pairing socially neglected first- and second-graders with popular children for cooperative, playful interactions led to measurable improvements in their sociometric status and quality of peer relationships. These gains did not happen by accident – they were the result of teachers deliberately creating the conditions for positive contact.

A 2025 study in Frontiers in Education further found that teachers’ own emotional competence plays a meaningful role in students’ social integration. Teachers who manage their emotions well, demonstrate empathy, and build trusting relationships with students create classrooms where children are more likely to feel accepted and socially connected. Social modelling by the teacher is not incidental – it is instructional.

A shared responsibility

Social and emotional struggles in young learners are not a sign of failure – they are a normal part of development that, with the right support, can be navigated successfully. The classroom is not just a place for academic learning; it is where children practise being human with each other. CASEL, the Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning, frames SEL as a powerful lever for creating caring, just, inclusive, and healthy schools that support all young people. When teachers understand the social landscape of their classrooms, recognise the signs of isolation early, and use structured strategies to build belonging, they do far more than teach – they shape who their students are becoming.

What do you think? How early should schools begin formally assessing children’s social relationships, and who bears the primary responsibility for a child’s social development – the family, the school, or both?

References

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Table of Contents

Why social relationships matter so much in school 🔗

Identifying socially isolated children 🔗

Withdrawal and shyness 🔗

Aggression and rebelliousness 🔗

Three types of isolation teachers should recognise 🔗

The teacher’s role in supporting social development 🔗

Creating an inclusive classroom culture 🔗

Using sociometric techniques to understand classroom dynamics 🔗

Facilitating healthy peer interactions 🔗

A shared responsibility 🔗

References

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Understanding the Elementary School Child

Why social relationships matter so much in school